The Final Cassette Tape
(I'm okay, please take care of yourself everyone, don;t read if you don't want to, this is kind of confusing or may be concerning to those who may be in a bad spot, please take care.)
This is impossible.
I don't understand it at all but maybe....maybe this is going to be different? Maybe everything will just disappear, maybe I'm crazy, but at least it shows I'm still alive. I must move out, moving out will make things different.
Tv.
Insert tape.
Static.
Take out the tape.
Smash it with a hammer.
Static.
Rip out the reels, and reels of all of the information, but it doesn't stop.
It wraps around my neck lovingly.
I want it to strangle me lovingly.
I really, really, want my vision to black out when it happens, so it doesn't happen.
dammit...
Someone in the distance, forever waving a flag again.
Song of the night "To Withstand the Force Of Storms"- La Dispute
"Oh, you've got a pretty mouth,
Leave your lips to linger on my skin and kiss me one last time
I will roll off your tongue like a whisper in the winter.
Sleeping in the sutures of the city's skin."
============================================================================== A Cassette tape implies it works both ways.
Video recorders of old had a dedicated playback button, for rewinding, or for playback on tv.
The static in my head is just a metaphor for my debilitating mental illness, as is anything, but even so, I am continually taking care of myself, doing everything I can.
I want to....
- DAY. LEFT.
- Lavinia